I have just read a fascinating article on The Times Online web site:
http://women.timesonline.co.uk/tol/life_and_style/women/relationships/article2999703.ece
It's by a woman who pays out £600 each month to spend a night with a man. She books a hotel, where she dresses up and he collects her from there. They go out for a meal and then return to the hotel where they have sex.
My reaction is - good for you. But then I have no issue with either men or women paying for sex. I don't believe people are being exploited in such a transaction. What does exploit men or women selling sex is the people who seek to control them and make money out of them -i.e. the pimps of both sexes. Especially the ones who control the prostitutes by means of drugs - this is exploitation.
If you chose to buy sex - whether you're a man or a woman - then I don't think this is anyone's concern but your own and that of the person you're paying. Not everyone wants to have a relationship where they share everything, and paying for sex can be an ideal solution. You may not have the emotional energy left over from the rest of your life to sustain a relationship - why should you deny yourself a basic human need?
In the article the writer chooses to do this because she is divorced and has children, and she does not want to get involved with anyone else. To me that is sensible, but many of the people who commented on the article thing it is disgusting. There are also comments from men along the lines of - why is she paying for it? I'd have given it to her for free. To me they are missing the point.
If you marry someone who is better off than you because you are fond of them and they're crazy about you - is this an immoral transaction? The world would probably say that's OK unless you then divorce him/her and claim millions. It's acceptable if you remain married - even if you do so because you like the lifestyle and can put up with sex once a week ofrwhatever. If you divorce you're branded a gold digger if you're a woman and a lucky chap if you're a man. As ever there are many double standards operating.
Much food for thought in this article.
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2 comments:
Yes I saw this piece in the paper too. And like you my thought was "good for her". A lot of people will hapily spend £600 a month on arguable far more inane things, like their car, than having a good relaxing night out, a good meal and some good sex. Sounds like a recipe for a well balanced life to me. Which is exactly why prostitution should be legalised: it is a vauable service which (should) help keep both parties in touch with themselves (sic) and reality; has to be better than prescibing endless Prozac, surely?
Probably cheaper than Prozac as well in the long run too.
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