Yes I've finished it and pretty harrowing reading it was too. I'm glad I did read it even though I am not at all maternal myself. I think she's a very courageous lady and cannot agree with India Knight in the Sunday Times that she was selfish in giving up her severely brain damaged baby. Julia Hollander knew she didn't have what it takes to give up her life 24/7 to a child, to the detriment of her other daughter and her then partner, now her husband. She had lots of misgivings about it and went through hell before everything was settled. The stupidity of our current set up for helping disabled people meant that Imogen's foster carer would always get more financial help and practical support than Julia would as the child's mother. Julia and her family always see Imogen every fortnight and will continue to do so and she seems to be very much part of the family. It seems to me that Imogen ended up in the best possible situation for her - with someone who has the abilities to look after her without resenting the sacrifice. Such a sacrifice has to be willingly made or not made at all in my opinion.
I have just spent all morning cleaning the car - it was disgusting! I even had to wash it twice before it looked ok - and I'm no perfectionist! What's more it's got some special coating on it that's supposed to make it easier to clean. It doesn't. I am very pleased that we didn't pay the dealer to put the coating on at £200! Instead we found out where to get the stuff to do it with and did it ourselves - following all the instructions. It's supposed to mean that you only need to polish your car once every three years - not true. I've polished it today because it needed it and it's only been on there 6 months!
I have just started reading Petite Anglaise by Catherine Sanderson - another book that arose out of a blog - looks like compulsive reading so far.
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3 comments:
I've been blogging about Julia Hollander myself. Whilst I agree that Imogen is in the best possible place, I wonder how the other daughters will feel when they are old enough to read the book, to really understand what has happened?
Yes Cathy I wondered that too. She does say at the very end that one of the resons she was writing it was so that her daughters owuld be able to read it when they were older. Maybe Elinor perhaps will write about it though obviously she may not remember too much being only 2-3 at the time.
hello jilly
I too have just read the book and also found it a very interesting and mind broadening read. I blogged about it last night, it's very interesting to read others views on it too!
prior to reading the book I would have been horrified if anyone suggested to me that they wanted to give their child up but reading this has given me more understanding to how difficult such a choice must be.
I think her other daughters would understand their mums decision. She often questions this throughout the book and she often reassures herself that it will give the family a better life. End of the day it was either give Immie up or sacrifice her husband, her sanity and possibly loose the time she spends with her 1st daughter.
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